I am nothing without God. I am totally dependent on Him and that realization brings me to the place of complete humility where I know I cannot do anything without Him. And that brings me peace. Why anyone would want to run from God and live a life of chaos and sin saddens me. And yet I understand how it can happen. I remember years ago when I gave my heart to the Lord, my life had transformed into a blissful place until I allowed someone slowly in and before you knew it, I was living a total lie filled with broken commands and quiet shame. I watched how the sin in my life washed away all the favor I had, the peace I had and the joy I had. It was replaced with a life of bondage .... sleepless nights, nervous habits, drugs, sleeping aids, an inappropriate relationship and an extremely hostile work environment. My life choices separated me from God and what is so sad to look back on, is I knew better and in God's eyes, that is worse for I had knowledge and I knew the love of the Lord, I witnessed it and experienced the life of living in His will and I had no reason whatsoever to stray like I did. I allowed the enemy in and I allowed that negative entity to replace the anointing and power of God I had on my life. As hard as it is to even recall that time in my past, it has made me the God fearing woman I am today. It has made me so strong in my faith that I vowed I would never allow anyone or anything to ever come between my God and I. I am so blessed to say I rededicated my life and have been on the path of righteousness ever since. That is the God we serve. That is the Lord that can take any sinner like me and forgive to the point that all my past sins are washed away and the veil of sin is lifted. Nothing separates me from God now and He wants that for all His children. If you have backslidden like I did, whether it is as extreme as my story or not, sin is sin in His eyes and whatever degree of running and hiding you have experienced, you are allowing "it" to come between you and your Lord. I pray today is the day that He calls you back into His arms and that today is the day you listen and obey. He loves you and He misses you and He wants you to know He forgives you and that He will never leave you, simply go to Him and allow Him to wash your sins clean and be whole with Him once more.
Hebrews 10:26-29
Galatians 4:9
Revelations 2:5
2 Peter 2:21
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